Part 3 - WELCOME HOME!

Andrew slept for most of the way home in the car. And after a not-so-quick stop at the service plaza to eat a late (and much needed lunch), we finally arrived home around 4pm.

I went into the house first. The plan was that I would say hi to AJ and my mom and dad and then get them to go to the door to see Jay enter with baby Drew while I videotape their reactions. This wouldn't be a problem bc AJ loves to jump out and say "BOO!" to anyone that comes into that door. So I went into our house and AJ and Nana were playing in the basement. Papa must be sleeping on the couch in the other room.

AJ was so happy to see me and ran over to give me a big hug. Nana then asked "Where's Jay?". I simply replied "Oh he had to get something out of the car." Little did she know that "something" was her newest grandson....and AJ's lil brother.

As Jay walked in carrying the car seat with a sleeping Drew, I started rolling the video camera. My mom sorta casually looked at the car seat, alittle confused. Looked back at me. And back at the car seat. And then BAM, it hit her - OUR NEW BABY! At that moment she looked directly into the video camera with this look of total shock - mouth and eyes wide open and frozen. I swear she kept that expression for a good 30 seconds straight. Then her voice got all cracky and she quickly and jokingly scolded me for in fact not being with Sarah all day. Haha!

We then introduced AJ to Drew and quickly gave him the Build-A Bear Dinosaur I made a few weeks back as a gift from AJ's future sibling to him. He, of course, loved it!

Then we moved on to the living room where my dad was sleeping on the couch. We simply placed the car seat on the floor next to the couch and let him figure it out. Before he could, my mom said "They got a baby!" Papa literally fell off the couch onto one leg on the floor!

Onto my grandmother - my dad already had plans to pick up Granny to take her shopping so I suggested he pick her up and bring her to our house first. I wanted to take advantage of as many in person surprises as possible - I mean, c'mon - how often does someone get to surprise their family with a baby?!

So Papa went and got Granny and we again videotaped the reaction. Granny put her hand over her mouth, gasping "OH" about 20 times as she entered the living room and saw my mom holding Drew.

PRICELESS.

The rest of the evening was spent trying to make clever phone calls to the rest of our family members. For instance, Jay called his mom and asked her if she could babysit AJ and Andrew that night. Haha. Grandma Sharon came to meet her newest grandson that night, too. We planned to surprise Jay's dad and step-mom by skyping them that night and just showing them Drew, but since their skype wasn't working, Jay told them on the phone. Then later that night we skyped and introduced them to Drew.

AJ reacted really well to his new brother's arrival. But that first night he preferred to admire him from afar, or when he thought we weren't looking. I managed to get a few pictures of those moments.

The next couple of days were filled with more introductions and visits from family and friends. We feel so blessed to have 2 beautiful sons and to have gained them through the miracle of adoption. This is not the end of our family story, but it is the end of our recent trilogy ;-) Thanks for staying tuned and celebrating in our recent addition!

Part 2 - Placement Day

10am. That was the time we were to be at Adoption Star to sign all the placement papers. We had to leave at 8:30 to get there in time. But 1st my parents had to get to our house so they could watch AJ. And they were late. They didn't know how important today was and how we needed to leave by 8:30. Again, they thought we were spending a casual, fun day with friends. When they finally arrived at about 8:45, I was - you can say - STRESSED. But we made it there in time. In fact we were early and Missy wasn't even finished printing off all of the paperwork yet.

Walking into the agency was interesting. We were excited of course, but nervous - VERY nervous. And I said to Jay that I hate that we have to read Missy's face to know if we are good or not. So as we walked in I stared at Missy until I saw a big smile come across her face. PHEW! Things are still good. We'd be meeting our baby today!

Jay and I waited in the Director's office while Missy finished up the paperwork. Thank God for that mini-slinky and stress balls. They came in handy keeping our hands busy at least.

The paperwork this time around was a breeze. No new information, no surprises, just what seemed like a million lines to sign and initial. But before we knew it, we were done. Still, I couldn't help but wonder - was "A" done with her paperwork yet? Did she sign the surrender papers? Were we still good?

Now it was time to head over to the hospital. First, we were to meet "A" and her family. Then we would meet Andrew.

Jay and I arrived at the hospital and waited for what seemed like forever in the lobby. Where was Missy? Had something gone wrong? Did "A" change her mind? Jay and I took turns staring At the 2 different points of entry. Finally Missy arrived.....looking upset. OH NO! Something happened. NOOOOO!

When Missy approached us, I quickly asked what's wrong?! She proceeded to tell us about her car having issues. Was that it?! She then realized that we were thinking that something happened with "A". She quickly reassured us that all was well, just taking a little longer than we planned. PHEW!

We were suppose to meet with "A" at 11am. Finally, at about 12 pm we saw a young girl accompanied by 3 women, a man and Adoption Star's birthparent advocate. "A" was crying and looking down at the ground. The 2 woman right next to her looked somber but suppportive. I immediately approached A and hugged her. Then Jay and I took turns meeting and hugging her mom, her grandmom and her mom's boyfriend. This is when her grandmom thanked us - the first of several thank you's we heard from her family that day.

We all sat down in the lobby and it was quiet. What to say?! So me being me, I started talking. How are you feeling? Do you want to ask us anything? Is there anything you'd like us to know? And so on. It was a bit awkward, but why wouldn't it be? Sitting in this lobby was one family grieving, and another family waiting to celebrate - both so wanting - no needing - the others to like us. I gave "A" the presents we got her and we got to know each other a bit more. We learned that "A" really loves to draw/paint, and that she is really into CSI-type shows. We told them a bit more about ourselves and AJ. Then it was time. Time to go meet Andrew.

"A" still had not seen him. She was very obviously protecting her heart. And she wasn't sure she would change her mind about seeing him. I could tell that "A" was struggling with this decision, and I felt really strongly that it was in everyone's best interest if she did see Andrew. I talked to her about possible regret if she chose not to see him. And then I made a suggestion - I suggested that "A"'s mom take a picture of Andrew and then come back out to show "A". That way, she could see him on the camera and then decide from there. She really liked that idea. First, we took some pictures of us with "A" and "A" with her family (FYI: In order to respect her privacy, we will not be posting any pictures of "A" or the birthfamily w/o their permission). Then, Jay and I followed "A"'s mom and grandmom to the nursery. We got a bit lost but finally the nurses escorted us over to Andrew - the only baby we even noticed even though others were around! THERE HE WAS - our son!

I so wanted to touch him and hold him and kiss him. But the nurses were alittle reserved at this point. They offered to bring us all in a private room. In the meantime, me and "A"'s mom took some pictures of Andrew. Then my most clear memory followed. "A"'s mom and grandmom left us alone in the room with Andrew while they went to show "A" the pictures. In the lobby earlier when we were anxiously wating for everyone else to arrive, Jay and I started to talk about AJ and how much we lov him and I got very emotional. Could we - would we - love another baby as much? All of a sudden that felt impossible. But in this moment as I looked at our newest son the umimaginable came true and I said to Jay "BOOM my heart just grew!". I was in love! Totally and completely! I got teary as I caressed Andrew's head and Jay and I stared at him. Then the nurse came in and said that "A" wanted to see him. So we left to give her some time alone.

The next several minutes were difficult. All I was thinking was that she would see him and instantly change her mind. And it would have been my doing, since I was the one to convince her to see him. But, still I knew in my heart that her seeing him was best for him and her....and ultimately for our family. When the nurse approached us and said that "A" wanted to get a picture of us with Andrew, we were over the moon happy and relieved!

This is when I held Andrew for the first time. With lots of eyes on us, I still managed to relax with him in my arms. Flashes were going off and I remember feeling so relieved that not only were we getting pictures of this moment, but that "A" wanted them as well. We even got pictures with "A" and us. I can't wait to frame one for Andrew's room!

Then the question became, did "A" want to hold him. She was so nervous but decided she did want to. She allowed us to take pictures and after about a minute she handed him back to us. But the look of pride that came over her face as she proved to herself that she could do this, was breath taking. Her entire demeanor changed and we saw real smiles across her face. We were so proud of her and so grateful that we played a part in this moment.

We all walked out into the hallway to say our goodbyes. We exchanged emails and "A" asked that we send her the pictures from the hospital that night. Then she pled with her family to get some pizza :-) We all hugged again and then we returned to the nursery to handle the discharge logistics and breath a HUGE sigh of relief. We changed Andrew into his going home outfit and I remember holding him snuggled into my shoulder and saying "This is where you belong!". Then, Jay held him for the first time.

The rest of the time in the hospital is kinda a blur. I was in awe of this baby and of his birthfamily and of all the tender, personal moments shared so openly between the two families. And now I was feeling a bit overwhelmed and I just wanted to get in the car and be alone with Jay and our new son.

Jay went and got the car while I was wheeled out of the hospital....an experience I never thought I'd get as a new Mommy. It was awesome!

And then we headed home......

Part 3 - Welcome Home - will be coming soon :-)

Our Angel Arrives! Part 1 - Match Day

On July 3, 2010 at approximately 9pm, Jay, AJ and I were just getting back from a neighborhood street dance in celebration of the 4th of July. We were exhausted from a long day of painting our tree house and a really long walk to and from the street dance. But it was a good weekend so far. The day before was our 5 year wedding anniversary and the next day was going to be spent with very good friends who are in from out of town. And then more prep for AJ's big kids' bday party on the 10th. Lots to do......and not a lot of time. But there was a surprise for us just around the corner.

Our son, Andrew David was being born as we relaxed on the couch from a busy day.....and we had no idea.

The next day, I was dancing with AJ to some Kidz Bop tunes when the phone rang at about 9:30am. I figured it'd be my sis since we were splitting the market shift that day with my parents. But it wasn't my sis. It was the birth parent advocate from Adoption Star. My head immediately started to spin. I tried to turn down the music and walk away from AJ's grabbing hands - he still wanted to dance. I was searching for a pen and my profile info sheet - I have these sheets scattered around so they can be easily accessible when we get profile opportunity calls. But of course, I can't locate a single one. Finally, I remembered - MY PURSE! There was one in there. All this time, Sue is trying to tell me about a healthy baby boy that was born the day before to a wonderfully sweet and shocked young woman. I started trying to jot down anything I could about thie potential opportunity. And then Sue asked if we wanted to be profiled. My heart screamed "ABSOLUTELY"! But my voice came out a more timid "Yes".

I was being cautious because in the short time that we have been homestudy ready, we have been profiled several times and none of the situations resulted in a placement.....not to us, not to anyone. And recently we were profiled and selected for a 2 month old baby boy. But our hearts were devastated when the birthparents changed their minds and decided to continue to parent.

But now we had another opportnunity.

So many fellow adopters told me after our failed match that our baby would find us soon. That it seems to happen so fast after a failed match, for whatever reason. So I did start to think "Could this be our baby?".

But we knew the birthmom was looking at a variety of family types and we told ourselves and each other that we weren't gonna get excited, we weren't gonna tell anyone, because we were not gonna get picked. And at least we knew we'd find out within a few hours this time so then we could just move on with our day.

I went to the market to work my parent's pasta booth. I didn't say anything about the call. Jay and AJ came to visit us at the market, and we didn't say anything about the call. They left to put AJ down for his nap and something made me look at my cell phone. MISSED CALL at 11:44am. NEW VOICEMAIL. Here it was, the dreaded call to call them back and then hear that we weren't chosen.

I call Missy from Star back and she says "So, how are you?" and I say "OK" and she says "Only OK? Are you sure?". Then I say something like "Why don't YOU tell me." And she says " "A" chose you and Jason!" Did I just hear that right? REALLY?! She continues to tell me more about the details and that she needed confirmation from both me and Jay that we were accepting this placement. Um, yes.

But Missy questioned my response. I guess I didn't sound enough excited or tearful or whatever she was expecting. I sounded, exactly what I was - shocked and cautious. Because of our recent failed match, I learned that getting a call that you are chosen does not necessarily mean it's time to celebrate. It's a STEP in that direction, but it's not a definite. And I needed to protect my heart. Missy didn't know about the recent failed match so after I explained that to her she understood.

Then she told me that Jason and I needed to decide on a name within a 1/2 hour so she could get the paperwork started. OMG! There was only one name that we had discussed agreeing on for a boy - Andrew. But what about a middle name?

We decided to go with Jay's middle name - David. Andrew David. Our son. AJ's little brother. REALLY?

After getting off the phone with Adoption Star folks and Jay, I went back to my parent's booth at the market and made up a lil white lie about who I had been talking to. See, Jay and I had decided that we weren't gonna tell them....or anyone really, until we brought Andrew home. Partly to protect ourselves if it goes bad, and partly to completely surprise them if it goes good.

So I proceeded to ask my mom if she could babysit AJ the next day bc we Jay and I were gonna hang out with our friends that were in town. Really, we were going to sign the papers at Adoption Star and then hopefully bring Andrew home from the hospital. My mom easily agreed. And so the scene was set for a once in a lifetime surprise.

But since we weren't really spending the day with our friends, and we actually had planned on it b4 we were matched, we had to tell my very good friend. So we'd tell her and my sis and that would be it. So that is what we did.

Finally the market was over and I could head home to start preparing for a baby. And that is how Jay and I spent the rest of the day/night. We timidly toasted with some wine and then went to bed. We knew we had to get a good night's sleep bc if all goes well, it may be our last one for quite some time. Of course, I didn't sleep a wink. Not at all.

Here is our last family picture before our new addition. This was taken just a few weeks ago.

Stay tuned for Part 2 - Placement Day........